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Thinking of reaching for that man bun length? Dreaming of your hair flowing in the wind? Here's everything you need to know from a dude who just took the journey
Nearly a year ago, I started growing out my hair. Not that I realized it at the time. It began with one skipped trip to the barber, then another, and another, until I’d gone from high and tight to decidedly shaggy. By month three, I decided to roll with it, despite the fact that I was smack in the middle of what can only be described as “an awkward stage.” It’s a stage all growers must grapple with, and is not without its trials.
But, I made it through and am now 11 months into my follicular journey. Things are less awkward, and I’m able to share a few lessons I’ve learned along the way. It’s been frustrating at times, but if you’re thinking about growing your own hair out, this will make the process (or the decision) much easier.
Start with Separation The last thing you want is an accidental mullet, so it’s best to start with it longer on top. I was lucky that my accidental foray into long hair-dom started this way, but if you’ve got the same length all over, you’d do well to keep it tight at the sides and back until you’ve got a few inches of growth up top. Then you can go ahead and let it flow.
There are Many Awkward Stages Each month is a new and different adventure in unruliness. It starts when your hair begins to creep over your ears, prompting the inevitable, Time for a cut, eh? from friends and family. It only gets worse once your hair hits medium length, around three or four inches at the sides. If you’ve got even a bit of waviness to your hair—and most men do—it starts to wing out, making your head look like it’s trying, however unsuccessfully, to take flight.
But Some are Worse Than Others The initial shag and the “flying nun” stage were the worst for me. Luckily, there are moments of relative respite in-between. Once it’s past clipper-length around the ears, you can simply push your hair back with a bit of product and it’ll look presentable for a while. And once those wings get long enough, they’ll be pulled down by their own weight (a little pomade helps things along until the hair does the work itself). Cherish these moments. They’ll help give you the strength to keep going when all seems lost.
Avoid Stress This is true for all aspects of life, but here, I’m talking about things that will cause undue stress to your newly elongated locks. That means no rough towel-drying. Instead of the back-and-forth motion you’ve used since childhood, you’ll need to grab sections of your hair with the towel and gently squeeze out the excess moisture. Also to be avoided is blow-drying, which may be necessary in emergencies—long hair takes more time to dry than you might think possible—but can make strands weaker. Also, no brushing when wet. It’s a quick and easy recipe for breakage, which is obviously not what you’re going for.
Shampoo Less, Condition More, Cut Occasionally If you’re like most men, your shampoo schedule is a mess. Get it right. If you’re doing it on the daily, stop. Over-shampooed hair is dry, dry hair is weak, and long hair needs strength. So focus on conditioning to build that strength. You can do it daily, but keep the shampoo regimen to two or three times a week at most. And when it comes to trimming, shoot for every two to three months. You’re aiming for enough maintenance to stave off split ends and keep the shape presentable without curtailing your progress.
Switch Up Your Products Pomades, waxes, pastes—these are all designed for short hair. Once you’ve got the extra length, you’ll need to switch to a grooming cream, a serum, or a leave-in conditioner to tame your mane. They’re designed for medium-length and long hair, so they won’t weigh you down too much. It’s a whole new world of products, just waiting for your perfect new hair.
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